On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
