i was born a porn star she said
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
