Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
