Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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