You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
