I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
