my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
