How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
