Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
