You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
she looked like the before picture.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
