My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Randomize