He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
