I think I am morally bankrupt
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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