the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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