We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
