Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
