brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
