Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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