She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
handjob tips. give me some.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
