Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
