but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
