This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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