..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
