this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
