so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
