I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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