Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
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