So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
How does it feel to date your dad?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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