bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
