my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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