:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
