I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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