just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
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