Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
