That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Randomize
