fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
