i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I just want nice things and good sex
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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