But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Need sex. Gaining weight.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
