About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
