Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
