Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
