i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
My dick has a subreddit
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
