you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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