I'm going to jail i love you
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
