fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
