so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
