This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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