Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
