Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
