Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
that is very illegal...i love you.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize